If you have read the blog about my labour and birth, then you will know that my baby came into the world to the sounds of shock as to the size of his hands.
Look at the size of his hands and feet the surgeons exclaimed!
As I looked at his large purple fingers and toes, I hoped he would grow into them…you know, like puppies do.

Those huge baby feet… Image © mummalifelovebaby

See? Wow.

I never realised just how much I would come to love those hands, or how obsessed I would become.
Those sweet hands that grasp mine like there was nothing else they would rather hold on to in this world…
The hands that would gently clutch at my arm when their owner was being burped over my shoulder, giving me the sweetest of massages…

Or the hands that would be clasped together in glee when my beautiful baby was happy and cooing away on his change table.
His cute little baby fingers would unfurl like a flower in the breeze while he was content, then curl gently up again with the softest of touches.
Those sweet sweet hands just kill me.

2 days post birth. He needed a manicure bad. Image © mummalifelovebaby

And for some reason I don’t even mind when those cute little hands Kung Foo chop me in the neck.
Or when they rip at my hair, or scratch my neck by accident with those long fingernails that I am too scared to cut in case I miss and get a thumb. Again.
No, those hands amaze me instead.

I am amazed at what he collects in them (how on earth did he manage to collect plant material in his hands when he has NEVER EVEN BEEN OUTSIDE), and also at just how frequently my little wiggle worm tries to shove his whole fists in his little baby mouth.
Like…wouldn’t that hurt? And…dude, they smell a little like spew today. Really? You find THAT tasty?
And oh my little baby, I haven’t seen anyone try to shove their hands in their mouth with such determination and ferocity since my drinking days.

When he was younger they would really smell sometimes. I never knew how he did it, but this baby was like a spew collecting ninja. I wiped up any rebel spews as soon as I would see them, but somehow he still managed to grab a fistful without me realising.
He then seemed to think it amusing to let it mature, refusing to open his baby hands until they smelled like stinky cheese. Mmmm… delicious… ?

Smells delightful. When cheese, not hands © Langan via Canva.com

And my dear darling husband try as he might with one free hand, was either unable to (or forgot to) pry the little man’s hands open to clean inside each fist of stink each night, so when baby happily and surreptitiously opened his little baby hands the next day, the scent of old spew would waft out into the universe… and straight into my nostrils.

It became my morning mission to clean out those stink bombs so when he next opened those little hands during the day I could breathe easily. Literally.

Now those hands are older. They no longer smell like spew collectors. They now grab my fingers and his toys with determination. Determination to shove them and all other things he can get those hands on into his mouth to lick, to suck on & to dribble over to his hearts content.

They now grab his bottle for him to try to shove it into his mouth, though more often than not the bottle is instead shoved into his cheek or his eye.

My baby is still a baby but I can feel him growing up already. He needs me less and less as the days go on, as he learns to do more for himself. I stare at those baby hands watching them get bigger, chubbier and more co-ordinated by the minute.

I know its too soon but I already feel sad thinking about those days when he wont need me at all. He wont need me to feed him or dress him or play with him. He wont need me to help put those damn socks back on for the 400th time in an hour, and its all too soon.

I keep worrying about this future, the future when he wont need me at all, when he wont want to hold my hand or when he wont let me kiss him coz his mummy is soooo embarrassing, and I have to remind myself to not think about it. I will try to enjoy the moment for now. To enjoy when those small hands wrap around my fingers, and when that baby gazes into my eyes like I am the most important person in the world.

And you know what? Right now I AM the most important person in his world, and he is absolutely the most important person in mine, and knowing this I feel such a burst of love that it clouds everything else in my world. Nothing else matters. I will enjoy this moment for what it is.

Perfection and full of love.

 

 

What can you not get enough of, when it comes to you baby? Tell us below!