Ahhh… Becoming a new parent.
The excitement. The joy. The new baby smell, and the precious awareness of new life.
We parents wander around in a state of delirious bliss for those first few months whilst adjusting to life with our brand spanking new baby.
We are entertained by a continuous stream of visitors all wanting to spoil us and spend time with our baby, enabling us to live those initial days out in an exhausting but happy bubble. Life is beautiful. It’s magical. It’s bliss.
However the visitors stop.
Yes, the visitors stop. The husband (stereotypically) heads back to work, and the routine sets in.
And then we are left alone with our new babies. We are left to learn how to cope with a new and very demanding personality in our household, on next to no sleep.
Now, many of us try to do this whilst also juggling ALL of the same things that we were already doing before our children came along. Cooking, cleaning, studying, or even working from home in some cases. This, on top of taking care of our little ones, can be highly exhausting both physically and mentally and can lead to a pretty serious case of mummy (or daddy) burn out.
So I have put together a list, based on my own experiences, of ten things all new mums want (desperately), but don’t want to have to actually ask for.
1.: Take the baby
Husband, I would love it if you would please take the baby as soon as you get home so I can have a quick break. Most likely I will use that break to put away the clothes that I folded up earlier today (and by folded I mean throw into a laundry basket and hope they will fold themselves on the way in). Even if this break is just for half an hour, it may help me find the will to somehow cook dinner for us both.
2: Grab the vacuum
Husband, please grab the vacuum once every couple of weeks or so at the very least. My back gets sore sometimes from bending over and playing with our little one or carrying him around to burp him when he is unsettled. And I don’t know if you have noticed but we do have a rather giant baby.
Right now the thought of vacuuming makes me want to go swimming in the Yarra with my tongue hanging out to lick whatever happens to be in there. Shudder.
3.: Don’t answer me with “whatever YOU think” when I ask you a question
Husband, I am really wanting your help when I ask you questions, because I am scared of making the wrong decision on my own, and as a consequence potentially causing our little baby to develop a 2nd head. It could happen. We are both parents of our little one, so I need you to also have an opinion about their upbringing.
4.: Make dinner occasionally
Husband, some days just the thought of cooking dinner after the long and exhausting day I have had with our little one makes me want to curl up into the foetal position on our couch and howl. So, plllleeeaaassse surprise me with dinner occasionally. I would be forever grateful.
Oh, and by “surprise”, I actually mean: Don’t ask what I want. Don’t ask how long to cook something for. Don’t ask if we have any cheese. Don’t ask what bowl you should use or where that bowl actually is, as my brain packed up and left on a tea break as soon as you got home from work. Sorry.
5.: Gimme a massage or foot-rub (oh yeah)…
Husband, my neck muscles are tighter than my pre-baby jeans from hunching over to feed our baby. And my feet are sore from pounding the pavement so I can get some fresh air into my lungs, air that does not smell like mouldy cheese. *cough…like the inside of baby hands, or behind the babies ear where old milk collects…cough*
If you could just massage those area’s a wee bit, it shows how much you care and that you luuuurve me. In fact, the longer you do it, the more you obviously luuuuurve me, and the more interested I will be in luuuuurving you back. Wink Wink Nudge Nudge.
6.: Talk to me, adult human!
Husband, when you get home from work I would love to have an adult conversation with you. Yes you, not the back of your iPad. Rest assured that never in our lives will I be THIS interested in finding out what is happening in your workplace, or what shirt you are going to wear to work tomorrow, or how much you hope your favourite sports team is going to win the game by.
Yes husband, those topics actually sound super interesting to me right now, especially as I assume your conversations won’t include the words “row row row your boat”. Unless of course we are actually in boats and you are wanting me to row row row mine.
7.: Give me a surprise day off
Husband, once in a while I would love a day off. One when I don’t have to cater to every demand of our small person, who still inconveniently doesn’t know how to speak English. Other than broom. I swear he says broom about ten times a day. I think he might want me to sweep the floor.
Sometimes I just really need a break from being needed by anyone or from talking to anyone, so I can recharge my batteries. Or at the very least so I can have the time to get to the shops to buy some more.
8.: Clean the toilets
Husband, if you have just used the toilet, please clean it afterwards.
Because it’s nice to not have to step in wee droplet’s when I stumble into the toilet in the middle of the night. If I am going to step into someone’s wee, it should be my own. That is all.
9.: Make some time for a family date day
Husband, please keep some time aside just for us…maybe once a month. Lets go to the park (without our phones or laptops or iPads) and just spend time hanging out. As a family. In the sunshine.
And as an added bonus we might see a few people trip over or fall off the seesaw. Bliss.
10.: Look after the baby at least one morning each weekend
Husband, please oh please give me a sleep in at least one morning on the weekend. The bags under my eyes are currently SO large and hanging SO low that I am pretty sure I could fit the weekly shopping in them with ease. Or a new couch.
Yes sir, a sleep-in would work wonders. And I would be much less of a grouch…I think. I can’t promise though.
Thank you husband. That is all.
Is there anything that you wish was done to help you as a new mumma? Well, leave a comment below and tell me all about it! xxx