My dear husband, bless him, said something that shocked me to the core last week.

To… The… Core.

He said…wait for it… “Sometimes I think you don’t like being a mum”. Wait…What? What??! WHAT???! Hang on a minute buddy. Let me just pick up my jaw off the floor from where it dropped whilst I try to make sense of what you just said to me.

WTF??!! via GIPHY

At first I was completely shocked. I was dumbfounded. And then I got upset. So I asked him why on earth he thought that (with a few swear words thrown in). And you know what he told me?

He told me that it was because of the night before.

The night before, our little one had woken up around 3am in the morning. You know the time – it’s when no-one should be up. EVER. On this particular night I was so tired from a massive week of work that I actually felt physically sick, and when I heard that lone wail break the darkness (and my sleep), I was so disappointed that I wanted to cry. And vomit.

I lay there praying that my husband would hear it and would turn into my knight in shining armour, leaping on his white horse to save (aka settle) our child so I could get some more of that desperately needed sleep, but he lay there quite happily snoring. Sigh bloody sigh.

So I did what any irrationally exhausted beyond belief mother would do. I slammed our bedroom door “accidentally” on the way out. Oops I woke you up. My bad. #suckedin #ifimawakesoareyou

The second I got back in bed after tending to our teething screamer, the wail began again. Crap. Please don’t make me get up again. My eyes were burning. Surely it wasn’t my turn again tonight??

So, this time I purposefully heaved numerous sad sighs and groans until my husband finally got up (YES!!!!!!!!) and gave the settling a shot. #winning #thankeffingeff

But that’s what made him think that I didn’t like being a mum.

Me trying to swallow my shock. If I was Britney Spears of course. via GIPHY

As much as I am totally head over heels madly in love with this man of mine, sometimes he can be a real dunce.

I mean, I had just been through the most massively intense week at work, and had been house hunting essentially on my own all weekend for the last however many weekends with no luck (he was working, not his fault) and I was STRESSED out to the point of near hysteria.

No sir, I will not – via GIPHY

But he forgot all of that. Which is impressive in itself considering the amount of whining I had done about how EXACTLY stressed and exhausted I had been feeling.

What I think happens in my house when I whine most of the time – via GIPHY

So when he heard me getting angry and irrational, he just assumed that I hated motherhood altogether.

BUT. He had it so wrong!

If he had seen me LAST week when our son woke up two nights in a row, then he would have known that I actually love being a mother. And I am kinda awesome at it!

Because I was in there soothing our baby and loving it like a weirdo. He couldn’t feel the love that was bursting in my heart. He couldn’t see the joy on my face as I held our sweet child. I was in my mummy element that night! And I nailed it like the occasional mummy boss that I am.

The “I am a fucking awesome mum” dance – via GIPHY

I spent a few days wallowing but I decided to snap out of it and instead concentrate on the things that make me an awesome mum instead.

Like, how I make our son my absolute number one. He gets so much love and attention during our special time home alone together. He is my sole focus. And I do everything I can to be there for him and show him how much I adore every little silly thing he does. I am a fucking awesome mum.

Or like, how I will spend time soothing our little one when he cries during the day or even in the middle of the night, because his teeth are hurting him. I have spent full days while my husband has been at work just holding and cuddling our son because he is hurting or feeling sick. I love holding him. I love how he burrows his little face into my neck. It makes me feel so much fucking love for that little human that I think that my heart may burst.

He is a fucking awesome baby, and I am a fucking awesome mum.

Or like, how I will make food for him from scratch three times a day. I don’t have to because…well…who gives a hoot how you feed your child as long as they get fed healthy and nourishing food? But I choose to cook food for him because it makes me feel like a fucking legend and quite frankly, I want to finish his food off when he is done with it. Really, when you think about it, I am just making food for myself and he super luckily gets to eat some of it first.

Oi! You! Leave that chicken leg for me!! – via GIPHY

Or finally like, how I will do ANYTHING I can do to make him giggle. I will dance, sing silly songs, pull faces, and shower him in kisses if I hear even half a laugh. Because there is nothing more heartwarming in this world to me than hearing our babies hysterical giggle. It makes my heart sing, and I fucking LIVE for it.

I will do anything for this kid.

But you know what? Sometimes I need a day off. Sometimes I am so fucking tired that I could cry. And sometimes I don’t want to get up in the middle of the night.

And that’s ok! I still LOVE being a mummy, even during the shit bits. And I am awesome at it. Just let me get a full nights sleep tonight. I really really need it.

Thanks.

 

 

How are YOU an amazing mum? I KNOW you are girlfriend, so tell me all about it in the comments section below, so I can give you a high-five from here… Much love you awesome mumma you…xx

By the way… Studies from the University of mummalifelovebaby (MLLBU) show that people who subscribe to the mummalifelovebaby website are more hilarious and attractive than most other people. Since you don’t want to be either weird-looking or as boring as a blade of grass, then you had better sign up now!  

And if you DO sign up now (seriously, do it), then you will receive my free mini ebook – “3 amazing things that you MUST do with chocolate”. YOU LUCKY THING! I mean, HELLO! Chocolate!

xxxxx