Sometimes it’s hard being a Mum. Sometimes it’s really very bloody hard.
I mean please don’t get me wrong because I love being a Mum. I love this job, it’s the greatest job in the world and most of the time it can be incredibly fulfilling. But sometimes it is as rough as nails.
SOMETIMES you spend each day longing to toss the kids in bed for the night. And SOMETIMES you want to throw something out of the window in a fit of rage. Might be yourself. Might be the kids. Might be the dog who just got under your feet so bad that they knocked you onto the floor and then ate all of the pancakes you just made even though you have a freaking cold and you DESPERATELY wanted to be in bed but you made them anyway coz you know it would make your kids smile. #ATotalLegendForAtLeastThirtyWholeSecondsLol #BloodyDog
But even when I am having the WORST day, or the most trying, or the most exhausting there is one thing that I am absolutely sure of… and that is that I am doing one hell of a kick-ass job as a mum.
And do you know how I know this??
Well, let me tell you.
A few weeks ago, you may have read my post about Mumma’s guilt. If you didn’t read it then, then you can read it now right here. And although I always have these waves of overwhelming guilt within myself where I wonder if I am ever doing ANYTHING right, there are SO many ways that I know that my “job” as a mum is getting done so well.
I know it because my kids are so damn happy.
They really, really are. And quite frankly they are super happy the majority of the time. They smile constantly and laugh more than they cry (times a million), and they are constantly looking for the joy in life.
When I am in the total shits, like when I am getting my period, when I have tripped over my 9 millionth hot wheels car for the morning, or when I realise my gorgeous Hairy Husband has done the dishes (hooray) but has just left them sitting out on the bench for me to put away (#HalfAssedJob), then the joy that shoots right out of those kidlets ALWAYS manages to lift me up.
Damn those kids are happy.
And you know what?! I feel within myself that my kids joy really is in part thanks to me. I have always made an effort to wake them up with a smile, with enthusiasm and with lightness. I try to treat them with respect, and kindness throughout the day. And even on those tougher days (or nights – FML) when they manage to frustrate me beYOND belief, I just roll my eyes internally, whisper FML to myself and just get on with it. Because their happiness (as long as it doesn’t come at the expense of mine of course) is so important. Its a wee bit addictive.
I know it because of how much they show me they love me.
This is my favourite part of my whole life, and is what makes everything worthwhile. I am not even kidding – it really does make EVERYTHING worthwhile!!!
So let’s talk about the snuggles, OH THE SNUGGLES!
My son is full of what seems like endless amounts of energy. However sometimes he will need a quick break from that bounding around and will crawl into my lap, wrapping his arms around my neck and nestling in against me. It may only last for 0.3167329 seconds but it is so beautiful and is a moment SO full of love that it fills my emotionally needy cup to epic proportions instantly.
My daughter is the same. At night times when I put her to bed, she nestles into me so completely with full body cuddles while I kiss her goodnight. And although she MAY love her stuffed teddy bears as much as she loves me (cough, or possibly more), those cuddles show me just how much and how perfectly she loves me. The way she looks at me is so full of trust and love that I have no doubt that I am a good Mum.
Sometimes she also cups my face in her tiny hands to give me a big smooch on the lips. And my heart explodes so much that I fear sometimes that I am dying from the love of it all. I’m dead.
Finally, my son also says the loveliest things to me. He cups my face in his hands some times and sighs “Oh Mumma, you are my love”, “You are my sweetheart” or “I just really really love you Mumma”. That gets me in the feels every freaking time. And every time he visits his grandparents, he always brings home a flower from their garden for me. It’s bloody beautiful. And I feel so loved.
I know it because of how they react when they see me after a long day away from me.
There is nothing better than coming home to the kids. Well usually.
Because the way that those faces light up as I walk through the door is absolutely priceless.
When I pick my son up from childcare, he runs towards me, literally RUNS, squeeling with happiness. He jumps into my arms and lets me smother him with kisses, and his face almost splits in half from the size of his grin. It makes my day every single time.
My daughter is the same, she also squeels with teeny tiny joy and throws herself at me from wherever she is (even if that is in someone else’s arms.
They show me how much they miss me by their gratitude of seeing me, and it really makes my heart sing.
And sometimes even though I do feel all of that overwhelming freaking guilt – am I doing enough, am I being enough, am I working hard enough or just a simple – am I enough?
I know in my soul that I am. I know that I am doing enough for these kids of mine. Because if I am able to take a moment to see those smiles, to feel those hugs and notice such joy pouring out of them towards me then there could never be any doubt.
How do you know that you are doing a great job as a mum? Because trust me, you are… OWN your own Mumma amazingness, and share what a great job you are doing below xx