Seven Months Old. Already? The baby is seven months old AL-FREAKING READY??!! I know, I know, I say this every month but SHE WAS JUST BLOODY BORN! I haven’t had a single second to scratch my bum or pick my nose since she got here, I swear! (more…)
My baby hit 6 months and boy oh stinking boy pants, have things changed. (more…)
Oh hey there my five month old baby girl!! Are you getting cheeky now my little bald-headed angel? Am I starting to sense some sass going on in that sweet baby head of yours? Five months in … I mean, is that too early to see potential sass?? (more…)
Eat. Play. Sleep. Repeat. That is my life now, right there in that sentence. It’s like Groundhog day over and over again (read about my Groundhog experience with my firstborn son here). And don’t get me wrong, I love it, but I forgot just how monotonous having a baby can be. Monotonous Monotonous Monotonous. Someone get me out of the house Monotonous. (more…)
Oh my gawd. The baby has only been earthside for a mere three months, and it already feels like the she is a teenager wanting to borrow my car keys and go on bloody dates using my credit card. What the frickin frick! Cough. (more…)
Two Months in. Who even am I? Who are you? What’s happening? Life with a baby … Fark me, its exhaustingly glorious. And call me crazy (hello crazy!), but babies are WAAAAYYYYY easier than living with a toddler tyrant. #JokesTheToddlerTyrantIsActuallyCoolMostOfTheTimeSortOfKindOfSometimes (more…)
Holy crapoly. She is here. She is here. My second tiny human is here! What the heck am I supposed to do with such a tiny baby again? Can someone please tell me? … And … Why is there a bunch of fuzz floating around where memories of the first few weeks of my FIRST tiny human’s life should be??!! Was I asleep …like…the entire time? Probably. WTF. (more…)
Oh my tired Toddler May you rest today in peace And please don’t wee the bed my love I can’t be arsed changing your sheets. (more…)
Oh Em Gee. Babies, huh?! God DAMN they are gorgeous and hilarious. Yes they are, but they can also be the craziest of time stealers. And when I say that babies are time stealers, I mean that they LITERALLY MAKE TIME DISAPPEAR for their parents without anyone ever noticing! I am not even kidding. I swear to god, I am so busy with the baby every day (and the toddler for that matter), that I get up in the morning, think about the long day ahead, FUCKING blink and all of a sudden it’s bed time.AND FOR THE FREAKING LIFE OF MY I HAVE GOTTEN NOTHING DONE ALL DAY. Although…hooray for bedtime! Woo! Let me explain this phenomenon further. (more…)
Ever wonder what goes through the mind of a super bald teeny tiny baby? I know I sure do. Instead of coming out of my hoo-ha speaking English as any good baby should, she babbles, squeals, snorts and squirms in my arms, and I have absolutely NO idea what she is talking about. Sigh. (more…)
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